Writer's mind is a library, where I can find thousands of quotes according to situation and deliver it with new essence! Library is a home for me other than a coffee house, books are friend and I live my life thinking where to put comma and what adjective will enlighten the simple word. Between italics and bold, I always wish my regular writing will make them special ! My whole life passes between memories and thoughts, sometimes I'm successful to deliver what I actual think , and get failed with stereotype writing . Sometimes when I decorate the words to give the character new life , twist the actual thoughts so a story can turn the readers upside down and create the Goosebumps in their belly, that is a winning for writer, for me and failure for my actual thinking !
When someone asks, "Where is your 'so called Introvert' article?" I just smile and
replies that it is coming next, but what I actual think is, why the hell you
are asking me about that unfinished article? Don't you understand I want it to
be it perfect ? I smile but I might have killed you hundreds of time in my
thoughts-inside my head. When someone hurts me, or behaves very rudely , I keep a
mental note about their name and make sure that the bad character of my next
chapter is named after them and in the
very first half of that chapter I give that character a crucial death.
For me this is my revenge :D
When someone talks
about how inspirational that previous article was because they think I'm self
motivated person, but I'm not. I live in an illusion where my world is perfect
inside my head, I'm frightened to lose my
thoughts, I firmly believe that poetry, I write is for someone special,
but that doesn't mean I'm already in love. I write frictional but that every
damn character is inspired from reality. You think my writing is magical, what
I think is about a miracle. When I say I want to write, my mind actual thinks
is : "I can't be the writer". When I start writing down things, the
storm in the mind gives headache and I end up with yellow paper without any
spoiled ink on it. When I say that I have read hundreds or thousands of books
but all I think hasn’t been written down yet. When you read something of mine
and think that this is cut to the point thing but believe me that same point
has successfully created hurricane in my mind since last month. I'm confused
from inside and mature from outside, you never know who I'm because of what I
write. I write what I believe in but my
writing, many of the times surprise me.
When I write there
is always one part of mine lives inside that writing, you kill the writing and I died a
thousand deaths. But when I re-read the same thing and try to find myself
between those capitals and adjectives I have used, I feel numb and devastated
of what I have write because when I can't think of one good reason that why I
have write this down, I disbelief of my existence completely. But I do exist and it takes days
to believe in myself again and start writing my thoughts. If I don't write then
that creates a high chemical reactions in my head and I end up being a noble
gas which doesn't react at all. That is why I write and a little compliment from reader makes my day and
that one criticized comment revolve in my mind till I write better.
When I write I'm a
tree with thousands of cherished leaves, a lot of lives in one person - myself, a
laughter of small kid and a scream with zero decibel of sound. Sometimes I'm in
pain and creates a happy ending love story because that is what I wish for,
when I'm happy I might end up writing sad poetry because the scars and memories
always haunt me. You never know what's inside a writer's head, until you become
one or become the other half of that writer who writes because there is You. I always need an inspiration from You. Always.
-Kemil Ghoghari
