Life of an Engineer after getting job! Part 2/3

The quote from this all get started on my desk!

Have you ever been restless? Experienced that edgy, cold sweating feeling? The nervousness before the exam, anxiety of result, 4 runs in 1 ball winning excitement  or that shaky hands and jumpy thoughts while going for the final interview.

Let me tell you what happens when your all friends has jobs before you and being a good story teller, they narrate the story of their hellish IT job life and how it sucks. All these horror struck thoughts generally travel in your mind like a roller-coaster ride when your names call up for the final round for the job interview. But before that all you're prepared for the interview is 'Sell me a pen' task and where do you see yourself in 5 years question. Suits and The Wolf of the Wall Street effect you know. I was clear that by playing cards game in computer if Mike Ross can acquire the job. I surely can. If not who cares? This is my last interview anyways. With the carefree mindset and without being nervous I entered in that cabin full with 3 people and who knew two of them going to change my life upside down.

As you read in the first part, I left the whole paper blank, argued with HR for like 15 minutes and the one person that stuck in my mind was the lady who was waiting for me in the cabin, her existence had power to embrace her value. The minute I entered, I got the gut feeling to crack the interview. As I had applied for the post of content writer and digital marketing they asked me about my blog, engineering and why I want to go in this field having very little knowledge about it.And I forgot the very same question, meaning of my name -_-

The round begin,

The Boss (Whom I later started calling Captan for some reason) : Why do you want to work here?

ME: Because you attract exact kind of people like you! (There was a poster saying the same line over the couch area. I just memorized it as I was gazing that freaking quote during their lunch time -_-)

Captan : What do you know about Backlinking, digital marketing, SEO, Social Media and Twitter

All these questions he asked one by one and I discussed replying back with the little knowledge I had about it. Though I totally stumbled upon the backlinking, he explained and then there was silence.

After few seconds, reviewing my Resume he came up with the Google's recently launched messaging platform Google Allo. What they asked me is their pros, cons and why after all these years Google had to put a foot in chatting application all of a sudden. I being a researched student about these AI and chatting thing cracked the question with full marks like an easy cake walk.  

 There were some other series of question about my hobby, passion and  the future. The only company that didn't ask me where I see myself in next 5 years or other some stupid questions.Though they did ask me the meaning of Kemil 0_0

Then the captan opened my blog on his MAC, and the first article was : "Life of a jobless engineer", I was smiling over the irony, that was going to happen.

Captan : How's your life then?

ME: Pretty excitingly boring. These were my exact words. On one hand I was exploring things I never had chance before, other hand I was miss being employed. Never knew the boringness will excite me that time.

We discussed some philosophical things here and there and then he asked that lady if she had any questions for me.   

The lady: Why do you think you're best for this role.

ME: I don't, as I have no knowledge about half of the things for the post. I only how to write and I'm good at it. It's your own staff who believes that I am good for this role and actually convinced me to come up for the interview.

I don’t know I was too confident, blunt, honest or rude or may be all four at a same time. But after that no one asked me anything. They just informed to give a task form home to write some sort of blog and submit it and then they'll judge.

May be they were preparing a backup. I later understand how the recruitment works. And trust me there's no fun knowing that shit.

Do I submit the article, I call off a job or come back again to meet them? To be continue in the last part of 1 year of employment.

- Kemil Ghoghari

Poetic Mind

Poetic mind running all over the stairs,
jumping from that window to see that face!

When heart exclaims hearing your voice,
the poetic mind spills the ink of my words of choice!

You hold the grip, don't let me slip,
my poetic mind will kill you in book with a flip!

Lemme stay here, on this stairs, stairs of thoughts;
Let my heart skip the beat, let my poetic mind wink!!

- Kemil Ghoghari (ms)   
 

Photographs - a memory lane!

"There she is.." I will always be the girl behind the camera, because I love making memories for me and for others. A true photographer knows the value of picture, I would  rather say the right picture with right moment of click!
#AGirlWithCamera

Everybody's posting the pics, even taking the screenshots of chats - memories that we are so afraid to forget! The fear that what will happen if someday we will be blank and won't be able to recall these moments?

What if we forget the day, the joy and the tiredness of that significant memory?
And in this process we just keep them alive here sharing with bunch of friends, tweeting with bunch of followers and keeping safe and long in our heart!

Memories with friends are Patronus to scare the hell outta dementors, memories reminds us the journey and a still pic of it reminds us that either journey is continues or the destination is more beautiful!

A new beginning of 'A girl with camera' with her new gear Canon 750D!
In the hope that she will get success capturing the life of the people around her. That seeing the clicks of her, people will at least remember her!
There are colors of people but as always she will go deep capturing the black and white niche of it.

Raise the toast for new beginning! Let's celebrate the moments and forgets the scars over cheesy smile!
Let's come in front of the camera, so she can shoot you right in the middle! :)

- Kemil Ghoghari

Why do we write?

I don't remember when I started scribbling down the word and the misery of thoughts in my notebook, neither I realized when the last page of scribbled stories took the place in my diary. I ask myself how did I start writing? As it always happens that my connection with words seem strange when I interact with people. I've intimate connection with words while I'm writing or thinking under the hot shower, more intellectual experience with dairy than any human being.

I was five when I got to know that I've lost something very important in my life without having knowledge of it's existence before. I found myself alone, facing that naked truth. I didn't want to accept it but there was no one to prove me wrong. For so many years I was being sad for the moments I've never actually lived. That’s where I build up the first layer of wall against me, with the hope that someone will have courage to break it down to prove me wrong. And that's how I started to write diary as I felt stationary in the moving life when it comes to sharing things. And same time life gave me beautiful gift, ability to write down the moments. I shared the moments with others and made a routine to jotted down those memories in diary to relive it again, whenever I feel myself lonely. With knowing the hard truth about my life I started the diary, and by sharing the same truth with someone, who was able to break that wall; I stopped writing my diary. Having someone, who understands your reason of sadness and makes no arguments of you being irritated or angry for no serious reason; instead helps you to recreate your inner self. In that period of time I lived the moments that no words can describe and no pages can store. I lost something and then I won but I went one step ahead of the 'Baazigar' I lost again. We lose, we won and then we lose again. Let's face this truth together.

The person who broke the wall, became the reason to build the wall again, more stronger than before. Again, diary held my hand. Again I became indifferent, with the split personality. This time, I was being more outgoing , I engaged with people and listened their stories. Everyone is in search of finding a good listener. They go to the people who either connect them with the right truth or speak what the person wants to listen. With falling in the first category, I found stories untold, secrets hidden beneath the dark side. With this, my behavior and personality confuses people. I became music lover but too rigid to listen someone else's playlist. I read books and write number of pages but became lazy to answer on whatsapp chat. The more I interact with people, more I started loving to spend time with My People. Those 4 or 5 idiots. I'm loud as well as quiet, the surrounding mimic of who I'm. Because it happened several of time when I open my mouth, everything collapses. This is where diary saved me. I used to send old fashioned letters to friends when I was unable to express how much they matter to me. Now they receive long emails and sometimes already scribbled diary with doodle and quotes as a gift. My diary stores someone's bitter moments as well as a beautiful love story of my two best friends. On one page there are my hidden scars and just when you flip the page being shocked it displays my creativity of poems. If one para described the philosophy of life, other shows my care freeness and incidents I don't even remember after those vodka shots I have thousands of stories to tell if someone finds enough of courage to read young girl's diary. The doodle lines one on another dictates my vulnerability, and the stains over some pages shows I can be messy with my precious diary.

It's bliss to have someone with whom you can share things, but to have a diary who hides the bags under your eyes or never judges you for bring total bitch is just another calming moment. I write because there is You! Always.

~ Kemil Ghoghari (#ms)

Life of an Engineer after getting job! Part 1/3

More than a year ago I described my life here, life as a jobless computer engineer. And soon after that I was employed. Life was pretty boring during the stage of unemployment. All I was friend with were some English TV Series, Quora and Books. You must be thinking, that I'm gonna brag about that phase, that how good that phase was and how much I hate my job now. But uhh ha, I'm gonna tell how I landed to the job which pays me for doing what I love the most.

So here's some precap,  after getting successfully rejected from so many interviews I convinced my parents to let me learn Photography while giving my last interview. I'm from small town and since adulthood; wanted to move to bigger one so I can pursue my dreams. So, that day I came here for the 'last interview' which didn't go good and there I was, so done with the whole 'job' thing. I planned my day to spend reading books and then visiting crossword. I was all set with the book in my hand and a cup of coffee when my beloved friend called me to appear at interview. There were two companies whose detail he sent me over email and bugged my head until I forwarded my resume. I forwarded the resume to the only one from the list and turned off my internet for some quality reading. (FYI : I was reading 'the last lecture' by Randy Pausch at 'my last interview' time.) Suddenly cell rang again, the girl on the other side introduced herself from WebMob Technologies. I was blank as I didn't even read the name of company before forwarding the resume, we talked like 5 minutes and she informed me that she has replied my mail. I cut the phone, opened the Gmail and there was one unread mail from her. She had sent me two-three job profile that fits in my resume, none of the title made sense though. I called her again to inform that I might not be coming but she was a git, she convinced me to travel downtown of this city. (Point to be noted by my friends : she convinced me) (Later when I observed her job as an HR, I feel sorry for her to face the candidates like me who didn't even read the name of company)

After an hour or so I reached there, the girl on the phone; being very nice and humble handed me the question paper for the post of 'Digital Marketing'. I spent 15 minutes or so and left the paper whole blank as I had no idea about back linking, keywords and many other stuff written in it.  I was called to wait on the couch for the final round, there was already a girl next to me, experienced one! The though stroked my mind :
"One more rejection it's gonna be as I've left the paper blank, don't even know what I have to do in Digital Marketing and the girl is having an experience. Give me one good reason these people will hire me. Forget it MS, on the ground floor there's Dominos, let's sneak out of here, have some lunch and visit crossword."

I opened Google Map and entered the nearest crossword from here. But then they call my name, asked me to go inside. And the final round began.

Stay tuned to know what exactly happened in the final round, thanks to Google's new product Allo how I got the job!

- Kemil Ghoghari

Midnight Thoughts!

So I started becoming insomniac just after I knew that such word exists for those who believe that nights are  more alive, vulnerable, honest  and peaceful than most of the day. First I thought that it's just me. Staring out of window. .But obviously not counting the stars or lying on my bed listening some sort of songs about which I've no idea. At that time I learned this funny word and the same time I learned about the thoughts I'm having at 3 in the morning. The thoughts that keeps me up all night.

But when I first tried to write these creepy thoughts in diary next  morning; all I could write was this.  

"So these dogs are barking and that's why I'm not able to sleep. Ughh this tick-tock of clock irritates me. Pillow is not perfect lemme put my hand below it. This bedsheet hurts my back. Ohh need some water, nah I don’t want to else have to wakeup at night for pee."

Yes, but what actually I was thinking during this midnight crisis? 

I was thinking about chaos in that pin drop silence and how badly I'm stuck alone! It was like I was finding something, wandering like a distracted girl who looses all her sense during her menstruation period. My string of thoughts were keep changing from my anger issue to those unsaid words I couldn't tell because of some fear and now I regret it so much; imagining all the different ways the situation could have been turned out if I haven't messed it up so bad.

I guess this happens with many of people like you and me. Sleeping is nice. You forget about everything for a little while. Where midnight never feels like the middle of the night, it’s like 3 or 4 AM when you stay up late; and this is hard because all you remember is the things you try hard to forget during day.  And you stuck to the series of questions, you dare not to answer.

Despite of all this late nights turn a person into who he really is. A piece of poem, stroke of brush in the white canvas, a line to compose some harmony or 4 AM thoughts turn out to be the masterpiece with ability to spin your life.  If it makes person vulnerable it also gives the hope. If one side you can stare the sky full of stars, you also stare the empty streets with hollow feelings. If late nights makes us think about all the wrong decisions then it also gives hope to learn from that. 

                                                                                                                          -Kemil Ghoghari (ms)

I wonder where Home really is?

Now a days my all lines of article starts with 'New City'. Even after bloody six+ months, I'm keep rambling this line 'new city isn't new anymore' and though I've the teenage crush on it this is still not the very same city which I stare at midnight and hate at morning. 

Here I'm, at last..

Much near to home,

Yet far away from here,

Never get enough of both.

I don't know where I'll go?

Will I ever stop?

I might become the divergent of road

Being the highest complexity to encode.

But when I come back far from woods,

I might wander again, to tell stories under hoods.

There where Home will welcome me I guess.

Letting me write on my own words of mess.

Here I'm at last..

Hanging between two ends,

Knowing nothing about beginning,

Oh dear I don't know what I'm missing!

After spending 20+ years in small but peaceful town I moved to this traffic jam city with big dreams and no money! But uh-oh certainly with so many advises of well wishers. With direct bombarding of 'this and that'; they were preparing me for the change, for the new city that I was soon gonna call Home. Period.

Here I'm at last…

Much near to home!!!

Now this word gives me strange feeling, few months back I was so excited to explore new things, didn't want to go back hometown and now even couple of days of holidays making me think about going back to native. And  I just don't know the reason. Is excitement over? Or It's just the irritation? May be I'm not old enough to understand but anyway the young blood is settled here, adjusted here anyway.

Old City : Purani Jeans

New city, Same Weirdness

Today when I see the first rain of city, or just wander here and there to know something that is hidden beneath, I recognized roads that I had no idea existed few months ago, the grocery store man and panipuri guy near my place recognize me and I've even found friends in this stinky city. But where did I go wrong? Trying to make this new city just like my old one to get that home feeling was mistake? Making same memories and finding the same spots here; was that a mistake? Just dunno. Now feelings are mixed up just like un-even shot of tequila and soda. Now when I go back to native I have to use public transport and they charge me more thinking I don’t know my old city. I get big laugh inner-side, probably on me that how much things have changed vice versa. 

I feel numb wondering where home really is, in those old roads where I learned my first bicycle ride or on these big roads where I go on long drive at night. I'm running between two home and never getting enough of both.  

                                                                                                                             -Kemil Ghoghari (MS)